Tuesday, 20 January 2015

How to Live Together

Myself and Rich have been living together now for well over a year (if you ignore the 7 months he spent in Afghanistan) and it has been my most enjoyable experience of living with another person I have ever had, and I've lived with a lot of different people over the years - an entirely different story I'll tell another time.

We manage to get on pretty well, and from conversations I hear at work, we're quite rare in that we managed to settle into living with each other pretty quickly, with minimum fuss. I thought today I'd share with you my top tips for how to live with someone without wanting to create a pillow fort that you never leave.

The biggest tip I can give for getting on well and not spending all your time arguing is to compromise. You can think that you're the best person in the world to live with, but I can guarantee that some little thing that you do will be driving the other person insane. For myself and Rich it was the age old leaving of the toilet seat up (Rich) and squeezing the toothpaste from the middle (me). So we compromised over it. I made every effort to squeeze from the bottom and Rich tries his best to always put the seat down, and it works, neither of us is cursing the other one now.

laundry on a line

This can also work to help you get rid of having to do chores that you hate. My most loathed chore of all time is taking the bins out. It's dirty, it's gross and it's such a pain in the bum, so Rich does that for me in exchange for doing the laundry, which he can't stand, making both of us happier.

You might think from all this that I am a believer of chore rotas. Nope. I hate them! To me, there is nothing worse than slaving away doing chores whilst the other person is having fun, gaming, watching TV or just messing about on the internet. It makes me instantly grumpy, as I would love to be doing whatever it is that they're doing, but instead I have to do chores. So Rich and I designate a block of time every week where we both work at cleaning and tidying the house, I'll figure out what jobs need doing, and then we both set about doing our own tasks, but at the same time. This means that neither of us resents the other for having fun whilst the other is working, and we get to spend more time together hanging out after it's all finished.

We use this technique for doing the washing up as well, I hear of so many couples having domestics about who's turn it is to do the pots, and them not being done for ages in protest, yet Rich and I simply do them together. I prefer to wash, and he prefers to dry, so we stand together and catch up on our days whilst doing them. I actually kind of look forward to washing up now, because it's often the first time all day we can just talk to each other without anything else distracting us. (We do eat together but as our dining table is in the conservatory it's chuffing freezing in winter so we eat in front of the TV instead).

So this is what works best for myself and Rich, we manage to live quite an argument free existence together, whilst still getting the chores done. I hope this has been helpful for at least one person out there, chores aren't often a common topic for blog posts!

Rachel x

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